A Gold Winning Performance - on, and off the field

I just read that Ansell are the official "condom supplier" for the 2006 Commonwealth Games in Melbourne. Until now, I had never thought of such practicalities, and while finding this amusing (culminating into a classic school boy giggle), it makes complete sense. Just imagine it. A village full of mostly 20-something athletes, all away from home and most likely experiencing a significant tension release (no pun intended) after completing their events. All fit, athletic, probably unattached, and on the prowl. Basically, I imagine its something like the Big Brother house, on a very much larger scale.

Despite this, I can't help but be astounded by the predicted frequency in which athletes are expected to "go for gold". Ansell is banking on each athlete and official having sex 10 times in 11 days, and based on this, will be dumping 60,000 condoms, and 60,000 units of lubricant at the athletes village. These figures are apparently based on statistics from the Sydney Olympics, where the initial supply of 50,000 condoms ran out, and an additional 30,000 were rushed into the village. I can picture it now - a truck arriving, Red Cross style, through the gates of the athletes village, Ansell volunteers on the back, throwing condoms to the hoards of desperate, sex starved athletes who gather around the truck (possibly rocking it from side to side).

If these stats are true, then I for one am most impressed. You might think, after competing at the highest level, that these men and women would shut up shop, and enjoy a quiet lemon, lime and bitters as they sit back and relax, and contemplate their achievements. But no, instead, they seize the moment, and continue to strive for excellence. I will be sure to enquire about this further when I next visit the AIS.

Unfortunately, Ansell are not planning to release a commemorative condom to mark the event, but rather, "hope every one will be memorable" (Ansell marketing Vice-President,Burton Van Rooyen).